It’s truly sad when a man loves a woman, or a woman loves a man and those feelings aren’t returned.

Its effects are detrimental to the establishment and institution of healthy relationships and marriages.

The problem starts in early adulthood. It takes root like a prickly thorn in your side never attempted to be removed because the pain is too great and if given attention forces you to acknowledge hard truths about yourself.

Pressing forward to the next as a coping mechanism. Not understanding that the good time, fun, excitement is a temporary fix to disguise what’s underneath. Only adding to the low self-esteem, lack of self worth, insecurities and all other negative reflections of self.

Pain, anger, rage, retaliation, and humiliation are just a few discrepancies in your emotional pool. Not wanting to take the time to seek help, talk through how something affects you, and allowing TIME to heal.

Outside influences are what you leech onto. They cause more harm than good because gravitating to them makes you feel good. They help you stay in the place you’re in by hindering your progress. Your actions are justified. They praise the wrong doing. They boost your ego.

We want a quick fix. We don’t want to feel emotion which makes us uncomfortable. If we could only embrace the uncomfortable pits within ourselves to get to a destination which is comfortable, we will understand the healing process, what it looks like and what it involves from us.

Instead, we let negative emotions fester and grow like a disease. It takes root and causes impulsive behaviors and others to get a rise out of us. Over time causing damage to ourselves and others. We cover up the problems. We don’t handle situations or people properly providing fuel to the cycle to repeat. When the cycle isn’t broken, it continues and causes a whirlwind of events which has a ripple effect into the lives of others because of your inability to see clearly and think straight.

The time to heal is now. Your destination doesn’t require nor include others. It’s a journey you must take alone. It’s a journey you must be serious about. It’s a journey you must embrace wholeheartedly, mind, body and spirit.

You’ll never learn how to cope, become healthy or heal if you constantly feel others owe you an apology, need to be the center of attention, think you don’t have to take accountability or responsibility for your actions, feel like your silence hurts others. What it shows is that you are weak, unstable, inconsiderate, gaslighting, incapable of functioning in the here and now.

Tips:
Break free from past traumas
Pray and put things in perspective
Apologize to as many people as you need to feel good about yourself and the situation
Make changes that you and others can be proud of
Turn away from old habits